I'm currently in D.C. visiting my brother- and sister-in-law and their two kids. Cyrus is just over 2, and Darya is almost 3 months, I think. Due to a variety of factors, we decided the best way for us to come and meet our new niece would be to each come alone for a weekend. So here I am. They just moved into a new house and, as I'm sure you can imagine, have tons of little things to get done. However, having the two small kids can make this a bit challenging, so I've been trying to be helpul.
This is the first time I've been away from the boys overnight since they were born. I guess you could say it's my first "vacation" in 3 1/2 years! And let me tell you, Cyrus is sooooo quiet compared to the symphony of sound that fills our house each day. I don't know if he's particularly quiet, or if it's a singleton thing, but man, even when he's being cranky, it just isn't loud to me. I suppose part of it is that he isn't my child, so it doesn't irritate me the way Kemper and Rowan can, but I have to confess I'm enjoying the toned down environment.
I did speak to the boys at bedtime last night. While we were talking, I realized another first - I had never spoken to them on the phone. It was pretty cute. Kemper of course claims that he behaved well for daddy, but seemed to take pride in telling me that "Rowan just whined all day". I'm sure he's leaving something out, but I suppose that's to be expected.
Do I miss the kids? Sure. But I'm certainly enjoying having a little break.
Sunday, July 15, 2007
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
The Gag Rule
You may think you know what the gag rule is, but I can assure you that unless you've been pregnant and suffered through morning sickness, you really don't.
Here's my definition:
If you're grocery shopping and some particular item makes you gag, don't put it in your cart. Instead, search for those few elusive foods that sound even remotely appealing and buy those. This actually makes for easy shopping, since you can skip over pretty much the whole store. Unless, of course, you're feeling generous and decide to buy something for the rest of your family.
Oh, and the pregnancy books that talk about eating a wholesome, balanced diet? Phooey on them. I'd like to see them try and choke down a healthy meal while trying not to vomit. I mean really, how are you supposed to eat well when the only things that sound good are not so good for you?
Here's my definition:
If you're grocery shopping and some particular item makes you gag, don't put it in your cart. Instead, search for those few elusive foods that sound even remotely appealing and buy those. This actually makes for easy shopping, since you can skip over pretty much the whole store. Unless, of course, you're feeling generous and decide to buy something for the rest of your family.
Oh, and the pregnancy books that talk about eating a wholesome, balanced diet? Phooey on them. I'd like to see them try and choke down a healthy meal while trying not to vomit. I mean really, how are you supposed to eat well when the only things that sound good are not so good for you?
Monday, June 11, 2007
The Devil is in the Details
So my previous post was a bit curt, I admit it. I had tried a couple of times to do the whole potty training thing, with disastrous results. But with summer camp looming in August (they require the boys to be toilet trained), I had to bite the bullet.Last week I spent a whole day with each of the kids doing the deed. I used a book about which I was rather skeptical - Toilet Training in Less Than A Day - but in the end it worked quite well. It has been a week now, and in spite of a few accidents, all is going much better than I could have hoped. We are diaper free! Even at night! Woo Hoo!
Now I need to spend a little more time on the small picture items - namely, how to wipe and the appropriate use of the toilet paper roll. The picture above is what I found this morning when I woke up. Rowan claims he only peed, but it looks like he got a bit distracted. Oh well. I suppose I should be glad he didn't flush it all.
Thursday, May 24, 2007
Sunday, May 20, 2007
Blessed
At church this morning, we had a flower communion. This is a Unitarian tradition, and we've certainly participated in this type of service in the past. However, there was something in this service that moved me to write this post.
UU churches aren't all the same - different congregations do things in different ways. One aspect I've seen in several churches is called various things. A time for all ages, children's story time, etc. At our church, they typically have this on alternating weeks, and usually the minister sits on the chancel and invites the kids to come forward while he tells a story related to the sermon. This morning there were not very many kids present (our boys actually go straight to their class at the moment, but we'll probably start bringing them to the first part of the service this fall), but two went up to sit with Marc. He told about the origin of the flower communion and talked about how we're all different but the same. He then asked if the children would like to help him bless the flowers.
One of the two kids, a small 5 year old boy, said, "What does bless mean?" To Marc's credit, he gave a great answer. He said something like, "When you bless something you make it beautiful with your words or your wishes, asking the universe to make it special". There was a bit more explanation, but this was the meat of the matter. The kids (and the rest of the congregation) then participated in the blessing of the flowers.
But I was really struck by the exchange. The bravery of the boy to ask the question in front of the whole church, and the minister's response simple enough for him to understand. And though I was attentive through the rest of the service, my mind stayed stuck on that definition of blessed. I've often (okay, always) kind of been put off when people talk about being blessed, but that is mostly based on my unpleasant experiences with organized religion.
It made me think about what it means to be blessed, or to bless. I struggle every day with my parenting, wondering if I'm good enough, if I'm too harsh, if I yell too much, and so on. And the definition that Marc gave today somehow allowed me to think in a different way, a way that perhaps can help me stay more grounded as I go about the business of raising my two wonderful children. How can I make my kids, myself even, beautiful with my words or wishes? How can I make them special? I don't know the answer yet, but you can be sure I'm going to be working on it.
UU churches aren't all the same - different congregations do things in different ways. One aspect I've seen in several churches is called various things. A time for all ages, children's story time, etc. At our church, they typically have this on alternating weeks, and usually the minister sits on the chancel and invites the kids to come forward while he tells a story related to the sermon. This morning there were not very many kids present (our boys actually go straight to their class at the moment, but we'll probably start bringing them to the first part of the service this fall), but two went up to sit with Marc. He told about the origin of the flower communion and talked about how we're all different but the same. He then asked if the children would like to help him bless the flowers.
One of the two kids, a small 5 year old boy, said, "What does bless mean?" To Marc's credit, he gave a great answer. He said something like, "When you bless something you make it beautiful with your words or your wishes, asking the universe to make it special". There was a bit more explanation, but this was the meat of the matter. The kids (and the rest of the congregation) then participated in the blessing of the flowers.
But I was really struck by the exchange. The bravery of the boy to ask the question in front of the whole church, and the minister's response simple enough for him to understand. And though I was attentive through the rest of the service, my mind stayed stuck on that definition of blessed. I've often (okay, always) kind of been put off when people talk about being blessed, but that is mostly based on my unpleasant experiences with organized religion.
It made me think about what it means to be blessed, or to bless. I struggle every day with my parenting, wondering if I'm good enough, if I'm too harsh, if I yell too much, and so on. And the definition that Marc gave today somehow allowed me to think in a different way, a way that perhaps can help me stay more grounded as I go about the business of raising my two wonderful children. How can I make my kids, myself even, beautiful with my words or wishes? How can I make them special? I don't know the answer yet, but you can be sure I'm going to be working on it.
Monday, May 14, 2007
Brotherly Love
We just got back from a week in southern Utah, where we were staying with my grandmother. She'll be 90 this summer, and I thought it was important to get out there with the boys while we still could.
Mind you, the desert has never been a favorite place of mine. Dry, hot, and bright. It actually didn't end up being all that bad - the first few days were in the mid to upper 70's, but by the time we left it was in the upper 90's. Even so, I can appreciate why people live there. It is beautiful.
We managed to make it to both Bryce and Zion National Parks, and enjoyed both. Zion was more successful, primarily because it was a shorter drive to get there and because they have a shuttle bus that runs through the canyon. The boys, of course, were totally into that. And they had fun running around the trails. Kemper wanted me to take pictures of all the caterpillars he found (and there were TONS), while Rowan was more interested in jumping off of rocks.
The biggest drag was the travel time, though. Flying for 7 plus hours is just not fun, and having 3 year olds along doesn't help. Don't get me wrong, the boys did extremely well. Better than us, really. I had packed all these little toys to dole out on the way, but didn't need any of them. Which worked out well, since the trip home got a little rough and I was glad to have some new things for them. On the first leg, the boys and I were all together in a row. We all fell asleep, but after a couple of hours Kemper woke up. He got a little fussy, so I took out one of the new toys. It was a small die cast metal biplane. His eyes lit up, he smiled, then he looked at me and said, "Is there one for Rowan too?" What a sweet boy.
Mind you, the desert has never been a favorite place of mine. Dry, hot, and bright. It actually didn't end up being all that bad - the first few days were in the mid to upper 70's, but by the time we left it was in the upper 90's. Even so, I can appreciate why people live there. It is beautiful.
We managed to make it to both Bryce and Zion National Parks, and enjoyed both. Zion was more successful, primarily because it was a shorter drive to get there and because they have a shuttle bus that runs through the canyon. The boys, of course, were totally into that. And they had fun running around the trails. Kemper wanted me to take pictures of all the caterpillars he found (and there were TONS), while Rowan was more interested in jumping off of rocks.
The biggest drag was the travel time, though. Flying for 7 plus hours is just not fun, and having 3 year olds along doesn't help. Don't get me wrong, the boys did extremely well. Better than us, really. I had packed all these little toys to dole out on the way, but didn't need any of them. Which worked out well, since the trip home got a little rough and I was glad to have some new things for them. On the first leg, the boys and I were all together in a row. We all fell asleep, but after a couple of hours Kemper woke up. He got a little fussy, so I took out one of the new toys. It was a small die cast metal biplane. His eyes lit up, he smiled, then he looked at me and said, "Is there one for Rowan too?" What a sweet boy.
Monday, April 30, 2007
Breaking the Silence
Wow, it's been a long time since I've posted anything. I think mostly we've just been really busy and I haven't been thinking much about what to write, plus I somehow think each entry has to be just right and so end up not writing at all.
Anyway, we're coasting along pretty well most of the time now. Don't get me wrong, I don't mean by that that having two 3 year olds is a walk in the park, but in some ways things are getting, well, somewhat less hard. (Note that I did not say "easy".) Most nights we don't have any wake ups, so I'm consistently getting 6 or 7 hours of sleep. What a difference that makes, I can tell you. The boys are so talkative and they play really well together most of the time. They aren't quite to the point where they can be fully trusted on their own, but we're getting there I think.
Naps are a thing of the past. If we happen to be in the car anytime after noon, they might doze for 20 minutes or so, but beyond that it's a rare thing. Today was therefore a bit of a shock to me. Kemper was being really whiny and uncooperative after lunch. I gave him several warnings - if he's acting that way, he really needs a nap and if it continues I'll send him to his room to rest - that went unheeded. When I finally lost my patience, I told him he needed to go upstairs and take a nap. He collapsed into a fit of tears, saying he didn't want to take a nap. I gave him an alternative - help me clean up his toys. His response? "I'm too tired!" At which point I said, "Then you need to go upstairs and take a nap!". Guess what? He did just that! I was in shock. He climbed the stairs, got in bed, and pulled the covers up. Slept for over 2 hours, too.
I love my boys, but sometimes when I luck into one of them falling asleep in the afternoon I get a taste of what it must be like to have just one kid. It seems so EASY. Today Rowan was as pleasant as could be the whole time Kemper was asleep. And it was great to have some time together without the competition they're so accustomed to. Of course, after a couple of hours Rowan started in with "Mommy, I want Kemper to come down now".
Anyway, we're coasting along pretty well most of the time now. Don't get me wrong, I don't mean by that that having two 3 year olds is a walk in the park, but in some ways things are getting, well, somewhat less hard. (Note that I did not say "easy".) Most nights we don't have any wake ups, so I'm consistently getting 6 or 7 hours of sleep. What a difference that makes, I can tell you. The boys are so talkative and they play really well together most of the time. They aren't quite to the point where they can be fully trusted on their own, but we're getting there I think.
Naps are a thing of the past. If we happen to be in the car anytime after noon, they might doze for 20 minutes or so, but beyond that it's a rare thing. Today was therefore a bit of a shock to me. Kemper was being really whiny and uncooperative after lunch. I gave him several warnings - if he's acting that way, he really needs a nap and if it continues I'll send him to his room to rest - that went unheeded. When I finally lost my patience, I told him he needed to go upstairs and take a nap. He collapsed into a fit of tears, saying he didn't want to take a nap. I gave him an alternative - help me clean up his toys. His response? "I'm too tired!" At which point I said, "Then you need to go upstairs and take a nap!". Guess what? He did just that! I was in shock. He climbed the stairs, got in bed, and pulled the covers up. Slept for over 2 hours, too.
I love my boys, but sometimes when I luck into one of them falling asleep in the afternoon I get a taste of what it must be like to have just one kid. It seems so EASY. Today Rowan was as pleasant as could be the whole time Kemper was asleep. And it was great to have some time together without the competition they're so accustomed to. Of course, after a couple of hours Rowan started in with "Mommy, I want Kemper to come down now".
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